Being in a relationship can be the greatest source of sorrow as well as happiness.
How do I get back into harmony?
– Try to change others?
Whenever I try to change something/someone by imposing my idea, in the long term it will cause sorrow and conflict. You can’t change how they feel about you, etc.
– Read about techniques on how to make friends?
They might not work because they are not always built on trust, love or understanding.
– Positive affirmations?
What really matters is how I ‘feel’ about myself rather than what I ‘say’ to myself. As long as I have the fear of being mortal, affirmations won’t work. Relating to myself has to be in the form of soul consciousness, as the immortal being.
– Fresh hope of new relationships?
At the start of any new relationship I make effort to be perfect but in time how I really feel about myself will be reflected in the relationship. The effort should not be on relationships with other people, but I need to work on the relationship with myself first (see part 3).
What if someone is not fulfilling their responsibilities and it is affecting me?
I need tolerance. Tolerance and being able to adapt myself to different ways of living aren’t ‘putting up’ things. As I accumulate internal power (see how in part 2), these events effect me less, I don’t lose the plot instantly. This gives me the capacity/time to discern the real cause of a problem and then tolerate. First send them good wishes, and see how it works. Visualise the situation before you go into it. This has a tangible effect on situations. Fear of conflict goes. I can make a clear and peaceful decision. I can talk to that person gently, from a place of peace and not in anger.
When what I do benefits others as well as me; this is a great way of living.
My consciousness affects the quality of my interactions. Peacelessness is to do with the misidentification of the self.
Body consciousness: relating to the world with the consciousness of being a physical being.
Soul consciousness: relating to the world with the consciousness of being made of very pure, spiritual energy.
The spirit is a point of light. See the self as a tiny point of pure energy with no negativity inside. External stuff is like layers on the soul, the clouding of how I see myself. The soul sits behind the eyes.
How is that going to help?
Investigate and see. Take your awareness away from outside and have a point of focus in your mind – a positive/powerful thought, gently remind yourself of one of your qualities. We start to get attached to our roles and expect other people give us what we need. If I am attached to others for peace, etc. there is the fear that I will lose it, this leads to frustration and anger. Focus your attention on the positive, it will burn the negative.
In soul consciousness I am detached from needing anything and I have the capacity to change my feelings. I start to enjoy the joy of interactions. There is no sorrow when the person leaves as there has been sharing rather than taking to fill the void inside.
Using all my energy through physical senses brought me where I am today. Am I happy? May be I should spend some time being detached from my senses. If I get the benefit would I not do it for a few days?
