Letting Go – 2 of 3

What is there to let go of?

– The Past: Life is filled with both positive and negative experiences. It is the negative ones in particular that we are talking of here- hanging onto negative experiences prevents us from healing them and moving forward in life. It is like going on a hike carrying a mega-heavy backpack. Does holding on work in your favour?

Say no to the past running your life; learn the lesson they are teaching you and move on. Note: to have a memory of an experience is different to living in the past, here you are no longer affected emotionally.

Know what to remember and what to forget.
Remember: what you need to do today and your ultimate aim.
Forget: irritations, worries, useless thoughts that take you down and resentments.

– Negative Emotions: Researchers believe that that if we hold onto negative feelings, sad emotions or depressing memories there is a possibility that we can reshape our ‘cells’ to the point that it has a negative effect on our physical health. Deep down we know these emotions are not getting you anywhere; that they are actually hurting us.

Know that everything happens for a reason; that there is a reason for what is happening to you- even if it is hard to see this significance right now.

Live in the present moment– start living in the now. Enjoy everything that is going on in this present moment; appreciate those things that you once thought were trivial; see what is going right.

-Situations: We become stuck in situations, such as, the job that I am competent at but is no longer fulfilling. As we hold on to what is familiar we don’t allow new experiences to enrich us.

-Results: Sometimes even though the job is done we keeping adding finishing touches- know when it is time to end that project i.e. put a full stop and move on to something new.

-Our negativity, limitations, weaknesses: To become who we can be we have to let go of the person we were: the beliefs, ideas, limitations…

Choose to accept what your life is now and what it can be. Focus on what is important to you. Focus on what you want next. When we do we automatically let go of the things that have been slowing us down. Focusing gets the mind moving in a new direction and stops us building up negative energy -created by focusing on negative emotions/events- which only attracts more negative situations. Focusing on more positive things we begin attracting positive situations.

-Fears: Fear limits us, holds us back, and blocks our progress. We cling to our fears though, believing they protects us. What are they protecting us from? What if we were to go for what we want and fail? Is it that we fear the pain of a failure so much that we seek shelter in the arms of fear rather than take this risk? So we live like prisoners in an unlocked cell refusing to leave because we falsely believe the cell protects us.

-Others’ mistakes: We all make mistakes and would prefer them not to be remembered- so aim to do this for others. When we are disappointed or upset by someone… instead of seeing them with a vision of ‘what they did wrong’ see them with a fresh new vision. This empowers us both instantly.

-What you don’t like in others: We can even get attached to other people’s irritating habits- because we don’t like it we hold it in our minds and then we get attached to it(!)

If you are upset with someone, stop and give gratitude for the things you do like about the person. It’s an easy way to shift your mood and “let go” of what is bothering you.

-People: Imagine that you are holding a beautiful butterfly in your hands. Now if you squeeze it too tightly the butterfly will be crushed. If you hold your hands too loosely it will fly away. The secret is to hold it gently.

-Worrying: This creates an atmosphere of fear and distrust in the self and others. Instead have faith in yourself and others and let it be that there is benefit for everyone in all that happens.

What are you thinking now? What were you thinking five minutes ago? Where did those thoughts come from? Go to? Thoughts simply come and go- it is what they are supposed to do.

-Desires: To let go of our desires is to let go of discontentment. Letting go means being able to stay at peace.

The key: see, value and appreciate what you already have. “Really there’s nothing, absolutely nothing, more that I really need to have.” When we let go of our desires our vision becomes unclouded and we are able to see what is needed according to the situation.

-Goals: Have you ever focused intently on achieving a goal you really wanted and wondered why it didn’t happen?

Declare your intent and then let it go. Sometimes we try too hard and don’t give things time to happen, maybe it is just that having done all you could now you need to just let it go for awhile. Lighten up. Let go of the desperation. Sometimes it is that we have too firm a grip and don’t allow things to happen. Relax, do something else that you enjoy and then come back refreshed. If you feel you are hitting a brick wall or things are not moving fast enough – it probably means you need to back away and “let go”.

Know what you can & can’t control.
See things for what they are.
Accept events as they occur.
Disregard what doesn’t concern you.
Everything happens for the best.
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