If my relationships aren’t healthy, no matter what condition my body is in, I won’t feel well because ‘no man is an island’.
Some relationships we can choose, some we can’t. Often they come with a responsibility, we can’t just step away.
Expectations bring disappointment and are an obstacle to God’s power being used.
How do I remain positive and not be coloured by negativity and give everyone the feeling of belonging?
We need to be detached like a lotus flower; this is not rejecting or dumping. To not give sorrow is the first rule in spirituality. I am floating on the surface of the lake, my roots are in the mud but I am above it i.e. I am in this world but above the negativity. Do not avoid anything or become engrossed, rather be loving and detached.
I go to so many different people to get these experiences, but then I get hurt. God teaches me to have all relationships with Him. Then I stop searching for love etc. from others. When my love is for God others will automatically love me.
What is the main quality that I need for healthy relationships?
The one thing that doesn’t change is who I am. I am a peaceful soul. Every human being can say this. This is our self respect, which is crucial in relationships. Even if I am not experiencing myself as peaceful I am it is just because there is rust on the soul. In meditation you try and clean the rust and tap into that inner peace. Paraffin –knowledge– is also needed to clean the rust. Information or truth sometimes hurts, we don’t accept it but when the rust is removed we feel the benefit. That’s transformation.
Giving respect becomes your natural nature, you wouldn’t know anything else. Even I don’t receive it in return I don’t stop giving.
React or respond in relationships?
Relationships are responsibilities themselves; I need the ‘ability’ to ‘respond’ but when my feelings become ‘so’ strong they override my thoughts and control me. Negative thoughts have a feeling of revenge. This is an obstacle in transformation. Meditation helps me to change myself. Anyone can sit in a corner and unwind, so have meditation with the thought ‘I want to change’.
How can I meditate?
First understand: Why you should meditate and then comes the ‘How?’
There are two worlds:
1st is the world that I see with these eyes, the physical world. 2nd is the inner world, the world inside my head. When I meditate, I am changing my inner world, my thoughts and feelings. This helps me to deal with the outside world in a more efficient way. Then the quality of my relationships is better. Feelings don’t control me but instead I am my own master, I am independent.
The purpose of relationships is that we learn from each other. Your relationship with others is a mirror of your relationship with yourself and with God.
What is my role in relationships?
To give happiness and love. I have done my bit and then I focus on my relationship with God. I take from God and give.
