WB: “I’ve been able to forgive two of the people with whom I’ve had difficulty with, but the third person… No. Not possible.”
Yogi: “The only thing is that until you have learned to forgive that person you will always have problems in your relationships, because a block in even one relationship means that I am blocking a whole flow of energy from working through me. I might think that it’s just a block with one, but in fact it’s affecting my connection with everyone else also.”
What is the alternative to forgiveness? Bitterness, pain, many hang ups and sorrow for myself, and this is just for me never mind the person I am not willing to forgive.
If there’s a bitter taste in one’s mouth then everything tastes bitter. Likewise, if I don’t forgive then that feeling of bitterness in one’s mind influences- consciously or unconsciously- everything else that we do. The process of forgiveness is part of our own healing, it is absolutely vital for our own health and well-being. We wont stay healthy if we don’t forgive
“The most effective way that I have found to be able to forgive is to remember the times that I have received forgiveness. This fills me with a lot of gratitude and a feeling of humility and I then know what it is I need to do for others also. When I look back and see how much I have been forgiven and how this has allowed me to move forward I know that I have a responsibility to do the same for others.”
The phone rang, the yogi answered and the person on the other end of the line was very angry and saying all sorts of things that they shouldn’t have said.
WB asked; What happened?
The yogi replied; It’s OK, if I talk about it I’m underlining it.
A little while later the yogi met the person who had been on the other end of the phone. Having literally put the conversation out of her mind she greeted them with such love and respect that they too were able to forget their own guilt at what had happened allowing their relationship to return to one of trust and regard.
“To be able to forgive others is really more a question of acceptance of others than forgiveness, because who am I to forgive anyway? Do I have the authority to forgive? Here is a human being, part of creation just as I am. It is the Creator and the creation who have a responsibility to each other. I as part of the creation cannot take responsibility for another part of the creation. What I can do is have generosity of spirit and heart in which I accept and so forgive also.”
Part of the reason of not moving on is the aspect of trust. Have you considered that the real reason that we don’t trust others is because we don’t trust ourselves? When we don’t have trust in ourselves we feel insecure internally, so how would I be able to truly trust others?
Why we don’t trust ourselves?
If we dive deep we come to see that this is because we have lost connection with our own inner goodness. We have forgotten it and even don’t believe in it anymore. The original state of every human soul was one of beauty, goodness and truth. In silence we are able to re-connect with ourselves and get to know that that core of goodness is truly real. It is not a fairy story but a a real story, our story and the story of humanity.
In this restored inner state of dignity I have faith in myself and trust in myself, and it then it becomes easy for me to have faith and trust in others too.
When we let go we are able to step back and see things from a distance. When we are too close we don’t see the whole picture. There is the saying: not being able to see the forest for the tress. You are in the forest and seeing the trees around you but you don’t realise that they are part of a vast forest and that you are in it. When we step back -even just a little- we begin to get a better idea of the whole picture. This understanding allows us to respond in a much more considered and appropriate way. When we are locked into a situation we tend to react, stepping back we can find another angle, approach or perspective on it. There is never only one way of looking at a situation.